Happy Birthday!

When is death born?
Is it when I saw your gaze stuck in the skies I couldn't see?
Is it when I Asked you  if you remembered me?
Its your birthday, yet the dreams I saw were full of sadness
I wake up and ask myself, why could I not see that smile?

The sky pours our rain when its full
I write it out when I am full.

I promised myself that I will sculpt my heart
Thrash it, cause it enough pain, trim it, until it stops doing what its doing
No more will I feel that pain I felt that day
A man with an emotional heart. is but a weak failure

What I see now, do you see it? My father, my friend!
I run. Keep my mind and heart running even when am sleeping
There is no time to rest.
If I ever stopped again, it would be when I sit with time
To tell her about my many secrets

When is death actually born?
Its when I forget the memories. Can I?
I have stitched my body with memories
My heart, my brain, my arms, my eyes, my legs, my mouth, my ears
That which had a relationship with you
Each organ is connected to each other with the memories.
Can I say you are dead?

I see my favorite actor, it reminds me of you
I see your woman, it reminds me of you
Do you call this death?
I wish, I could have taken you out.
Had a glass of wine
Eaten weird food until we were full
Showed you the beauty of the world myself
Told you loud and clear, I would win! I won!
Well, never in my life will I share this heart with another flesh
Felt death once. Will feel it twice. Thrice is when I will see it!

Tell me. Tell me about your new family.
Did this birthday even matter?
Stupidity. Madness. The ticking of clock, does it even matter?
Do you count days? Do you pray for rest?
What is it that you see? What dies it feel like?
This illusion called life, do you even remember?
Love. I never understood what it meant.
But what you were for me was far beyond that.
It was death that took it away from me
Yes!

My father, my friend! I will assume you're looking at me right now
And I am literally wishing you Happy Birthday!
I wonder if this is whet they call madness.
Lets write it. Who knows, may be someday, someone will understand what madness is.