Tribute to My Pain

The paths we walked and the words exchanged are like mirages
In this vast desert of sorrow, these memories are like a comforting shade
Such a two faced memory,
Happy as a fawn, then comes the pain. Pain.
The secrets of the nights disappear with this dawn
I think of that everyday
The secret tears will fade away with this new dawn
But every dawn is the same. Just like us
It repeats, over and again.
Make me a mask I ask him every day
One that I can control with my mind and fool myself
Get drunk and forget the final expressions
Smash the bottle of wine on head and let it flow into my mind and eyes
Drown. Drown in the confused state of sorrow and anger
My words written in silence, words written during the most silent nights
Do you hear them? Do you feel them?
I carry them in my heart and in my head wherever I go
At times I close my eyes and get lost in the past
The blessing, my imagination, will be the end of everything.
At times I think I can crawl back into her womb and lay down forever
These strings tear my minds apart and scatter my thoughts among the tombs
I seek nights now. Seek silence. Seek solitude
I break my wings, tear the feathers and drench them in my blood and pain
Dump them in garbage for the dogs to eat
These wings, these wings supposed to take you higher.
Away from this bloody world.
These wings, I tear them for I have fallen to dust.
I wear a sack cloth and mourn our memories
I punch the rocky heart. Wounding it in silence.
I scream in my head unafraid. I scream out loud infront of your tomb
Till your bones shake. Till you hear my cries.
Till each nerve in my throat breaks
This mute shouts, do you hear?